I Live in Paris

Saturday August 9th, 2008

Underneath some monument, Paris

Marching around Paris like a couple of unnamed German Army people circa 1940s.

Today Meghan and I walked around Paris - we walked from Eifel Tower, down Champ Elisee, to Louvre and then collapsed at my place in Montmartre. I finally got to go up the Eifel Tower; last time I was in Paris a snowstorm shut the city down. It obviously is worth the seven Euros, but probably not the 3 hour line-up. We were going to go to Versailles, but the ticket line was so long it would be safe to assume that if we went it would be amusement park line-ups without all the people screaming in the background to keep you excited.

Meghan Way with Birds, Notre Dame Cathedral, Paris

Walking in Paris is really fun for me because there are lots of great places to sit. There are statues, huge staircases, benches and gutters to rest your Chuck Taylor destroyed feet. As a side note, I noticed today that I have had some sort of allergic reaction to the Indian food last night - so if you saw an unshaven, grumpy man, with puffy eyes massaging his feet on Saturday night then you were probably in Paris.

Joe Momma, Bathroom of Eiffel Tower, Paris

After the death march that was our day out, we went out for dinner at a really cute restaurant behind Sacre Cour. The trick to Montmartre is that the area facing Sacre Cour is touristy crappy crap crap, and behind it are really nice, authentic Parisian restaurants bars and residences. We went to one where I convinced the waitress to give us an already reserved table would be much better suited to an obviously authentic unshaven European.

View from Eifel Tower, Paris

The food there was the best I have ever eaten in Paris, but the wine was clearly used to clean the windows. I ordered this cheese dish that was egg and cheese with bread to dip and I will spend to next couple of weeks trying to figure out a way to inject it directly into my brain.

Sacre Cour also has a bunch of Spanish people with guitar playing at night amusing all the people drinking on the steps as well as giving the pickpockets easy targets. With the view of Paris from there, it’s impossible to not immediately fall in love with the charm that is Paris at night.

 

Friday August 8th, 2008

Always copied and never duplicated, the one, the only, Paris France!

My flight for Paris left at 6:50 from Dublin airport so I had to leave Galway at 1:15am. Which means after my flight, and my one hour bus ride into Paris, Meghan and I were going on no sleep. I will be in Paris till the end of August, but Meghan only until Sunday so we had to force ourselves to walk around sans sleep so Meghan could get the maximum Paris in two days.

I could probably think of 500 things off the top of my head that could be worse than walking Paris in a zombie, dream-like state. I am writing this entry the next day and I still feel like half my brain is on a table somewhere being stabbed with an electro pen so I THINK that I am in Paris. This could be the 1 Euro bottle of Champagne I choked down last night or it could be this is Fucking Paris. Paris!

I have been to Paris before, when I was 21 - but I don't remember it like this. As I recall back then I was terrified of getting mugged in French and not knowing what the person wanted from me so I kind of hugged myself for two weeks and took some pretty photos so I could say I was in Paris.

Seven years later I have returned with my jaw firmly dislocated on the "oh my gaw" position. My apartment overlooks Sacre Cour - it’s outside my window. My window with an ornate iron balcony. The photo below sucks - but it is my view from my bedroom. So you suck.

My lonely planet travel guide says that every country makes its claims to Paris. "Denver is the Paris of Colorado", Come to Orangeville - It's the Paris of Durham county. Paris has become an adjective for beauty, fashion, and hip culture. Despite artists always saying that a certain art scene in Paris is nothing compared to say Berlin for example, Paris's status as an icon of everything cool will always be there. This is because Paris is everything cool. Paris is winding streets, its small cafes, it’s fashionable and beautiful people and small boutiques, its crumbling churches - it’s a huge city that has it all.

That being said by millions of people and FINALLY by Joe Fuda, Paris is also wonderfully dodgy. Without my wits about me, I couldn't bring myself to bringing my Canon 40D around - so today I took photos with my little Fuji.

The charm for me of Paris is that everywhere; in the architecture, in the city planning, in the museums, in the advertising, is a love and dedication to Paris that is simultaneously revered and also ignored by its citizens. My favorite things to do today were walking into cafes and thanking the patrons for how wonderful the coffee was and also how wonderful the city was. If you put in a little dig at North American culture, Parisians will look at you with a quiet respect like you helped them spit in the coffee they just gave you.

I think in fact that art in Paris is a bit like the Internet. There is so much of it and it is so overwhelming that you would be arrogant to think that you can experience it all in one lifetime. Also to carry the simile further, if you make a wrong turn you are likely to get smacked in the face with some hot foreign sex.

 

My worthless opinion on Paris is this - It's best to immerse yourself in all it has to offer without pushing yourself to experience it all.

We went to the Jewish and gay district which is supposed to have great shopping. I am not one for shopping these days, but the area does have some amazing gardens and cafes. After we went for Indian food where we got a bottle of water and some tap water which were quite obviously from the same faucet.

Monday - Wednesday August 3rd-6th, 2008

I haven't moved from my computer in three days! I haven't shaven in five. Ladies, my schedule is WIDE open.

Well those of you who read this thing should know I have barely left my house in three days. For this reason I have no new photos. I took some shots of a rainbow from my window - but they suck. I didn't have any assignments and I leave for Paris on Friday so I decided I was going to make the website that I have been putting off for about 4 years.

It's funny, for 4 years I have been asking friends, I have been getting quotes from designers, I have been scribbling in my notebook all these amazing ideas that I was going to implement; and then one day I realized it was 4 years later and my site had links to Napster and made that "You've got Mail" voice when you clicked on my contact information. It took me three days to learn how to, design and launch my new website. THREE!

Now, let’s take you on a tour. First you type in www.fudagraphy.com [ADD BOOKMARK] and you notice that you can now visit my BLOG from my website. You will also notice that I have lots of new and lots of the old photos up. Let's call it - Joe's greatest hits. For those of you assholes who are still going to joefuda.COM you should know its .ca and I never had a .COM address for the joefuda.ca and now I have a .COM so you can stop buying the www.joefuda.COM guy's old Volkswagens and check out my sleek and sexy new site. You can still visit www.joefuda.ca - it takes you to www.fudagraphy.com

It was designed by ME! Meghan scribbled on some pieces of paper for moi and I took some photos of them and connected them to my WICKED photo loader and now I am ready to bear all the children of the new empire. Is it bear or bare? I will impregnate you with my mad programming skills. If my site doesn't look amazing on your computer it’s not my site - it’s you. You are lacking and not worthy to view it. Or your resolution is too high or too low. I'm not a programmer, I'm a photographer hence I don't know that nerdy crap.

For the record, photographers wear leather jackets and tell models to "take off their clothes so we can make some art".  Programmers do the same, but they do it through their World of War craft avatars.

It's all pretty straight forward. You click on photos, you go to contact, you send me an e-mail about how you had a crush on me in high school or how you made a HUGE mistake by dumping me and have my Pearl Jam, Raveonettes, or Cuff the Duke shirt draped over your now wrinkled and thus undesirable body for my pleasure. It's THAT easy.

This blog entry is three in one so I had to stick a HELL of a lot of sarcasm in it. I also read Persepolis which is an AMAZING graphic novel and a wonderful movie. Next entry will be made from PARIS FRANCE. In my PARIS FRANCE apartment. I just thought I would stick that in there if there are any of my ex's who were still on the fence.

 

Saturday August 2nd, 2008

I saw a castle, climbed a mountain, and played in a shipwreck - ALL of this was NOT at the Radisson Hotel

It is all over. This is something I repeated to myself in my restless sleep as the memory of working in the hotel industry circled my head like disfigured cherubs of death. Today was my redemption day. It reminded me of why I worked in that hotel in the first place. For more of God's sweet nectar, which when converted into Earth currency is the Euro. My friend with a car, Yvonne from Disconnect4, had to pick up an amp at her parent's place which meant another free roadtrip!

A while back she mentioned to me when she was in the area and had some free time she would show me around the outskirts of Galway County some more - an offer which was so amazing I still can't believe her generosity. She brought her really great red-headed friend Fergile - pronounced a little bit like Fraggile from Fraggile Rock - with her probably so I could get the full hanging out with an Irish red-head experience.

Early in the morning we headed to a mountain called "Sli Chonamara" - which means something like "Dirty Road" in Gaelic. On the way there was a sign for a castle which Yvonne was only too happy to roll her eyes over and stop for a brief detour. The photo is part of Aughnanure Castle which was one of the pirate lady Grace O'Malleys string of castles. This is one of the few castles around that is fully restored for tourists.

If you are interested in going it is important to note that it was probably restored by a grade 10 shop class and they used so much plaster on the inside that if you went in on drugs you might think the walls were made of Vanilla Ice cream. For reference - they are NOT made of Vanilla Ice cream and they frown upon visitors climbing or licking the walls.

Sli Chonamara is an amazing place. I was told that the area used to be a forest but about a thousand years ago all the trees were cut down and burned which - after time - gave the heavily rocky area the bog soil and grass throughout. There are natural springs and limestones in huge quantities all around with no civilization anywhere in site - Important information if anyone wants to make some money bottling water or digging for Dinosaurs.

It was not a steep climb to the summit, and the entire way was dotted with sheep - all of which are sadly camera shy. At the top was a very old looking church which was actually built in 1986 on the spot called "St. Paddy's bed". It was apparently a place where St. Patrick while bringing Christianity to Ireland decided he was pretty pooped and built a water well and carved a slab of comfy rock to sleep on before he passed out. In reality, it was probably a place where the Catholics could do ceremonies without being persecuted and turned into human soccer balls.

If you go, bring some raincoats because it could start raining without the usual few warning drops. Also be prepared for some nasty winds that on the right angle will slap you in the face like a Portuguese Ex Patriot.

Try as I could, with as many photos I took - I still could not capture how beautiful this place was. It was the end of the Earth. A place where you could see the ocean in the distance and rolling green mountains with halos of rainclouds obscuring their peaks. You cannot take a photo of smells, you cannot take a photo of wind on your neck, and I could not take a photo of how beautiful it was in those mountains. Though the dramatic photo of me below comes pretty damn close.

After the mountain climb up and down we went into a small neighboring coastal town for the best clam chowder and Pint of Guinness I have ever had. We were short on time, so we took a few snaps in a wrecked fishing boat [the photo at the top] and headed back to Galway City.